201 کان 276
What happens when God is unhappy with you? According to the Sindhis, you lose your good sense. Hence the saying:
202. رب رسي، مت کسي
رب رسي مت کسي، ھڻي ڪين ھٿيار،
ڏسي اھڙو پار، جنھن سان جوکو جي جو.
Must one be dejected when bad days are around? Not at all! Sindhis believed that when one door closes, another hundred open. Hence the saying:
203. رب ھڪڙي لٽي، سھسين پٽي.
Sindhis believed that: one must be sensible before embarking on a tricky mission. Hence they urged one to adopt a course which would make one achieve ones goal, without stepping on anyone else’s happiness. They said:
204. اھڙو ڪم ڪجي جو، لال به لڀي پريت به رھجي اچي.
Which means: Let us act in such a manner that we find the sought for gem and we continue to retain the friendship.
The following proverb urges one not to take up too many tasks at one time as it would spoil ones endeavors. About such people Sindhis observed:
205. اھي ئي ھٿ روٽي ۾، اھي ئي ھٿ سوٽي ۾.
Which means that: People, who take up too many tasks at one time, are like those who use the same hands to knead dough, and the same hands to plait their hair.
The latter proverb implies that if one performs these two tasks at the same time, then his food would not get hygienically prepared, and his hair would get soiled.
The following proverb, though it may sound similar, has a different meaning altogether.
206. اھي ئي ھٿ نير ۾، اھي ئي ھٿ کير ۾.
It literally states that the same hands that are immersed in the water (tears) are also immersed in the milk. The implied meaning of this proverb is that: at times life doles out two tasks at the same time. One provides pain, and the other gives joy.
Sindhis believed that you should do what you have to do as soon as possible. They stated:
207. ترت دان، مھا ڪلياڻ. يا: ترت ڪام، مھا پِڃُ.
Which means that: if you execute your duty promptly, it is equivalent to performing a good deed.
Sindhis believed that it was the tongue, or unkind words which caused the most harm, they not only hurt the ones that the harsh language was meant for but also the one who uttered them. Sindhis stated:
208. اھا ئي زبان اسّ ۾ ويھاري، اھا ئي زبان ڇان ۾ ويھاري.
Which literally means that: the same tongue makes you sit under the sun and it is the same tongue that makes you sit in the shade.
Sindhis urged one never to harm the down-trodden, as God would take up their cause and take revenge for the harm done to the poor. Hence the saying:
209. آھِ غريبان، قھر خدائي.
Which literally means that: if the down trodden cry in pain for the harm inflicted upon them, then God Himself takes revenge. Sindhis also believed that:
210. اڻ ھيريا نه ھير، متان ھرنئي،
ھيريا نه ڦير، متان وڙھنئي.
This proverb states that: one should not get someone used to constant favors done out of goodwill, because when you stop doing them the benefaction, they might turn against one. Alternately Sindhis stated:
211. سخي کان شوم ڀلو جو ترت ڏئي جواب.
Which means that: he is better, who promptly says "No" to a proposition, rather than the one who says "Yes" to proposals, and then goes on to resent the same.
There are people who do favors unto you, but hurt you by constantly reminding you, and/or being nasty to you. To such people Sindhis advise:
212. ڏجي نه ته ڏکوئجي به نه.
Which literally means: "Do not give, if you must hurt the person later.
It is ever so difficult to please everyone all the time. And to top it, to please oneself seem to be, even a more monumental task. There is no argument to the statement that if one is happy, the world seems a great place to live in. Hence;
213. جي خوش، جھان خوش
Which literally means that: if one is happy, the world is a cheerful place to live in.
It is easy to criticize others, because we are not in their shoes. One cannot argue the fact that only the person who is in the situation is aware of why he/she behaves the way he/she does. Hence the observation:
214. ڳڙ ڄاڻي ته ڳڙ جي ڳوٿري ڄاڻي.
Which literally means that: the sugar knows, and the bag that carries the sugar knows (how light or heavy, how empty or full, or how clean or dirty the contents and/or the bag are).
Sindhis urged their fellow brethren to be good. They claimed that there were various benefits to derive from being exemplary. They stated:
215. ٿڌو گھڙو پاڻ کي پاڻھي ڇان ۾ ويھاري.
Which means that: a cool pot of water seats itself in the shade. It implies that if one stays composed one stays out of conflict.
To stay out of conflict, one has to sometimes bow down to a fool to benefit there from. Hence the Sindhis stated:
216. پنھنجي ٿوري، پؤ گڏھ کي پيري.
Which literally means that: for ones benefit, one sometimes should pamper a donkey (a fool).
217. لڇمي وڃي، لڇڻ به وڃن
Which literally means that: What happens when wealth bids adieu? Sometimes it takes your good qualities with it.
Another method of remaining peaceful is not to be distressed, when one possesses less, and not be proud when one has much. Thus:
218. ٿورو ڏسي ارھو نه ٿجي، گھڻو ڏسي سرھو نه ٿجي.
Sindhis believed that: one should live according to ones means. Hence they observed:
219. سوڙ آھر، پير ڊگھاڙجن
Which means that: one should stretch ones legs according to ones blanket.
It is believed that if your right hand does a good deed, your left hand should not get to know about it. On this creed, Sindhis opined:
220. نيڪي ڪر، کوھ ۾ اڇلا.
Which literally means that: after having performed a good deed, drop the thought of it into the well.
There are people, who do nothing but exaggerate. About such humans, Sindhis stated in Sindhi that:
221. نوڙي مان نانگ نه ڪجي.
Which literally means that: such people convert a rope into a snake.
222. ٽٽون کي ٽارو، تازي کي اشارو
Which means that: Spur to the good running horse but whip for slow moving.
223. جتي لوڀي ھجن، اتي ٺوڳي بک نه مرن
Which means that: Where there is greedy, the cunning will not remain hungry
224. ھڪ ھٿ ۾ ٻه گدرا کڻي ڪو نه سگھبا
Which means that: Two swords cannot be occupied in a single sheath.
225. مير بجار کي ڪنن جي ڳالھين مارايو.
It means: whispering makes others suspicious and there is internal friction and house divided easily falls just like cards!
226. جو وڃي جاوي، سو ول نه آوي،
جي ول آوي، ته پڙ پوٽي ڍاوي.
پئسي بنا پرساد، ھرو نه ڏئي ھٿ ۾.
شڪ جي دوا، حڪيم لقمان وٽ به ناھي
It means that: there is no remedy for Suspicion!
227. زبان آھي ننڍڙي، پر ڄاڻ وھ جي ڳنڍڙي
It means that: Tongue though is a small, but it may be considered full of poison, if not used properly. For people who exaggerate, Sindhis said:
228. جبل کي ٿيا سور، ڄائي ڪُئي.
Which literally means that: the mountain had labor pains, but only a mouse took birth. Similarly:
229. ڪُئي لڌي ھيڊ ڳڙي، چي: مان پساري آھيان.
Which literally means that: a mouse found a piece of turmeric, and claims to own a grocery store.
About people who paint an exaggerated image about themselves, Sindhis claimed:
230. لڀي گھر ۾ لٺ ڪا نه، چي: بابو بندوقن وارو.
Which means that: he is a type of person who does not even own a stick, and he claims to be a master of guns.
In matters of relationships, Sindhis made interesting observations.
For a brave man they believed that:
231. مڙس ته ڦڏو، نه ته جڏي جو جڏو.
Which literally means that: unless a husband is hard to please, he is not good enough.
Probably the macho image of a difficult man was attractive to a Sindhi woman. On the other hand, may be the proverb was coined by the parents of the girl to make her life more satisfactory, by praising the negative traits of her husband.
In the following proverb however, they categorically compare a son-in-law to a crooked stick. Sindhis state:
232. ناٺي، ڏنگي ڪاٺي.
Present time Sindhis would probably disagree with the above observation, as one often sees sons-in law as caring as ones sons and daughters.
During the time that our fore-fathers lived their life in Sindh, daughters must have been a lifelong liability, hence Sindhis stated:
233. ابو گسي، ڌي وسي.
Which literally means: father has to work very hard so that his daughter prospers.
It is interesting to observe how much the daughter’s parents would give in for the happiness of their female off-spring.
The following proverb was probably coined by dejected girls’ parents who would not reciprocate the humiliation inflicted upon them by the in-laws of their daughter. They stated:
234. جن کي ڏنيون ڄايون، تن سان سينو ڪھڙو ساھيون
Which means that: once one has given ones daughters in marriage, one cannot get angry with her new family.
The previous two proverbs point to the fact that having daughters put one through difficulties and humiliation at the time when these sayings were coined. However it is interesting to note that the Sindhis of yore believed that a son shares you properties and possessions whereas a daughter partakes of your joys and sorrows. Hence Sindhis stated:
235. پٽ ٿئي مال ڀائي، ڌي ڀئي حال ڀائي.
Sindhis stated:
236. ماءُ جي دل مکڻ، پٽ جي دل پٿر.
Which literally means that: a mother’s heart is soft as butter while the heart of the son is made of stone.
Elders claimed that though a mother-in-law be hard as wood , she is good to have around, as during times of need she would always be there to extend a helping hand. Hence they stated:
237. سس، ڪاٺ جي به گھوري.
About a daughter in law, Sindhis believed:
238. نئين ڪنوار نَوَ ڏينھن، ڇڪي تاڻي ڏھ ڏينھن.
Which literally means that: Bride remains a new bride for 9 days or utmost for 10 days. This proverb probably means that a bride gets to rest for 9 days after which she starts her domestic duties.
The mother-in-law of those days resented the relationship her daughter-in-law had with her own family. Hence there is the saying:
239. ويٺي ھئي رٺي، مٿان آيس پيڪاڻو نياپو.
Which literally means: She was sitting annoyed and upset, and to make it worse, came someone to visit from her family.
Yet strangely, to contradict the above, the following saying states that: the in-laws of one’s off-spring are as dear to one, as one’s own eye pupils. Thus Sindhis stated:
240. سيڻ، آھن نيڻ.
Sindhis believed that:
241. جيڪو ڏاڍو، سو گابو.
Which means that: he who stands his ground, eventually wins.
Yet during arguments and discussions, Sindhis wisely observed that:
242. تاڙي، ھڪ-ھٿي نه وڄندي آھي.
Which literally means that: one cannot clap with one hand. It implies that wherever there is an argument, all parties are probably to blame to a certain extent.
About the grand children from the daughter’s side, Sindhis claimed:
243. ڏوھٽا وڌندي جا ويري.
Which implies that: the children from ones daughter were never close enough to their maternal grand-parents, however much the latter pampered the kids.
This was probably due to the fact that children spent more time with their paternal grand-parents, and hence were influenced by their opinion.
It is interesting to note that this proverb does not generally ring true now-a-days, probably because grand-children spend enough time with their maternal grand-parents and formulates their own beliefs. Maternal grand-parents claimed:
244. ناني رڌڻ واري، ڏوھٽا کائڻ وارا.
Which literally means that: maternal grand-children eat while the grand-mother toils and cooks.
Grand-parents believed that:
245. مور کان وياج مٺو.
Which means that: the interest is always more enjoyable than the principal amount, thereby implying that one tends to love ones grand-children more than their parents.
Talking about interest accrued from wealth, Sindhis observed that: interest "runs" which implies that it augments even during the night. Thus they stated:
246. وياج، رات جو به پنڌ ڪري.
About interest they also claimed:
247. وياج آھي صورتي گھوڙو.
Which means that: interest is like a racing horse. On the subject of debts Sindhis observed:
248. قرض، وڏو مرض.
Which means that: owing debts is like suffering from a bad disease.
249. ويندو ڏسي ڪو نه، ايندو سڀ ڪو ڏسي
Which means that: People have a way of noticing how much money comes into the house, but they generally never keep count that how much goes into expenditure.
However whatever one is able to salvage from a bad debt is good. Hence if a ship drowns, salvage the iron. The latter is what is expressed in the following proverb:
250. ٻڏل ٻيڙي مان، لوھ ملي ته به ڀلو.
The following proverb states that:
251. جو چلهه تي، سو دل تي.
Which means that: one is always fonder of those members of one’s family with whom one lives and eats together.
The following proverb did not contend with the last saying’s belief because Sindhis claimed:
252. ڏيرياڻيون ۽ ڄيٺياڻيون، ستن جنمن جون ويرياڻيون.
This means that: sister’s in -law (wives of brothers), continue to remain enemies since the last seven generations. Even though they probably stayed and ate together.
Maybe the reason for the arguments and quarrels was the fickle mind of the woman. For such females, Sindhis claimed:
253. چري کي چوڙو، ڪڏھن ٽنگ ۾ ته ڪڏھن ٻانھن ۾
This literally means that: a crazy woman wears a bangle, sometimes on her wrist and sometimes on her leg. This proverb is pointing to the fickle nature of an unstable woman.
Misunderstandings on financial matters were probably as common then, as they are now, hence elders very wisely stated:
254. ٻه ڀائر، ٽيون ليکو.
Which literally means that: where there are two brothers, a written document (of finance and properties) must exist.
Well, brothers seemed to enjoy a certain power. Then what about a brother’s wife? Elders observed:
255. غريب جي جوءِ، جڳ جي ڀاڄائي.
Which means that: the wife of a poor man is like a brother’s wife to the world.
I believe that the above means that just like a brother’s wife was supposed to serve one with respect, so was a poor man’s wife.
When sensitive mothers-in law would want their new daughters-in law to follow a certain code of conduct, they would instruct their daughters, and naturally the daughter- in- law of the house would emulate the same act. Hence the saying:
256. چؤ ڌي کي، سکي ننھن.
Which means: If you instruct your daughter, your daughter-in-law learns.
Obviously during the days of yore, there must have been daughters in law or/and wives who spent enough time following their own pursuits or the following proverb would not have been formulated. It claims:
257. گھر گھوڙن کي، ٻار چورن کي.
Which literally means that: the house has been left to the horses, and the children have been left under the care of thieves.
Sindhis probably did not broad-cast the above news, because they believed that one must not wash dirty linen in public. Hence they stated:
258. گھر جو ڪن، گھر ۾ ڌوئجي.
Which literally means that: one must wash ones dirty laundry at home.
Talking of homes Sindhis stated:
259. گھر ۾ گھر، ٻڏي وڃي مر.
Which means that: if your extended joint families live under the same roof, you are as good as dead.
Obviously Sindhis were talking about the intrigues, tensions and arguments that would result because of so many people of different hue and character living together. Hence they stated:
260. گھر جي گهه پيهه، مٽن جو پاڻي سڪائي ڇڏي.
Which literally means that: arguments in a house can get so hot, that they are capable of drying up the water in the earthen pots.
261. جي خوش، جھان خوش
Which means that: If you are with health and pleasure, you will find the world in pleasure. Laugh and the world laughs with you.
The following saying was probably formulated by a dejected mother-in-law who claims:
262. شيدي سِڪي ويا، سيبائتي سونھن ڪاڻ،
سس سِڪي وئي، سياڻي ننھن ڪاڻ.
Which means that: the dark-skinned people yearn for a fair complexion, whereas I long for a sensible daughter-in-law.
The above mother-in-law probably agrees with the following proverb:
263. سھڻي صورت کان، سھڻي سيرت ڀلي.
Which means that: it is better to have uprightness, rather than possess good looks.
Yet another saying exists to confirm the above belief.
264. سھڻا ٽوهه پٽن تي پيا آھن.
Which literally means that: beautiful "tooh" abound in the desert.
This proverb implies that just like "tooh", which is beautiful in look but bitter in taste and grows in plenty in deserts. Similarly good looking people have no value, unless they possess good qualities.
Sindhis believed that:
265. نادان دوست کان، دانا دشمن ڀلو.
Which means that: it is better to have a wise enemy than a foolish friend.
Sindhis also believed that it is better to be criticized by a wise man rather than be praised by a fool. Hence they stated:
266. مورک جي خوشامد کان، سياڻي جي ٽوڪ ڀلي.
Sindhis probably believed that a stupid friend is like a:
267. سکڻي ڪُني، اڀامي گھڻي.
Which means that: an empty vessel bubbles more, or makes the most sound. Empty vessel, thunders much.
Probably that is why Sindhis concluded that it is better to cut a bad finger, rather than the poison spreads. Hence they stated:
268. ڪِني آڱر، وڍي ڀلي.
Yet Sindhis did not want to make generalizations. They realized that:
269. سڀ آڱريون برابر ناھن.
Which means that: all fingers are not of the same size or shape.
Not only about people and friends, but Sindhis observed that, children born from the same parents never enjoy the same destiny. Hence they claimed:
270. ماءُ ڄڻيندي پٽڙي، ڀاڳ نه ڏيندي ونڊ.
Which means that: though a mother gives birth and life to children, yet she cannot divide the same destiny equally amongst them.
Even though each of us enjoy separate and different destinies from our siblings, relatives and friends, Sindhis believed that rather than burn in envy because others enjoy better fortune, one must remember that by wishing them well, one tends to benefit from their good fortune, if one continues to be their friend. Hence they say:
271. سائي مان سَوَ سُک.
Which means that: one can derive a lot of benefit from the fortunate ones.
Sindhis urged the less fortunate ones; not to lose heart but to have patience. One should never lose heart, during the ups and downs of life, but be patient. They claimed:
272. صبر جو ڦل، مٺو آھي.
Which means that: patience brings a sweet reward. The Sindhi wise ones believed that:
273. پَرُ پيو، گھرُ ويو.
Which implies that: when an intruder enters ones house, he may be the cause of the destruction of one’s home.
Though Sindhis were famous for their "Mehmaan navaazi" which means that Sindhis were excellent hosts, they were also wary of intruders and therefore urged others to eye them with suspicion. About such people they said:
274. آئي ٽانڊو کڻڻ، بورچياڻي ٿي ويٺي.
Which means that: she came only to borrow a charcoal, but remained to take full charge of the kitchen.
Sindhis did not only criticize what harm others can inflict upon you, but realized that you alone can be responsible for what fate holds for you if you choose to do the wrong thing Hence they said:
275. ڪوئلن جي دلالي ۾، ھٿ به ڪارا پير به ڪارا.
Which means that: if you work in a coal mine, your hands and feet are bound to get soiled.
I would like to close this offering in the form of this booklet of ours by one of the wiser sayings of our fore-fathers which claims:
276. جان جي، تان سِکُ.
Which means that: there is no end to learning and that while one continues to live one continues to learn.
One will learn more from the wise sayings of ancestors. He should have to follow the roots of society through these sayings and get moved towards the future with intelligence, perseverance, pride and dignity.